Several people have contacted us with questions about adoption, especially pertaining to orphans in Haiti. I have pondered for several days how to handle these inquiries. And alas in my hesitance, I have found a scapegoat. In the link below, you will find well-written, clearly laid out, no punches pulled, essential information regarding adoption from Haiti (or any other country for that matter).
This article will help you understand the reality of the process of adoption. Thank you Mark Miller (whoever you are)! But in addition to the paperwork, waiting, red-tape, and so on; there are also many emotional issues that must be truthfully addressed. Let me begin...with a story.
Once upon a time there was a young man who'd left his father's home in the country to embark on his own fortune in the big city. After years of toiling and working his way up the proverbial ladder, he longed for simpler days and returned to his father's farm for a time of reflection.
Late one evening the two went for a stroll through the open pasture. The young man looked up into the wide expanse of the night's sky and was mesmerized by the brilliance of the moon and the abundance of stars that seemed close enough to touch.
He spoke in near breathless excitement, "Oh, Dad! Despite all of my accomplishments and all of my wealth, I have never felt so complete as I do right now while realizing my own insignificance beneath the beauty and magnificence of the heavens. Thank you for sharing this moment of wisdom with me!"
Sensitive to the emotion of his boy, the father sighed deeply and said, "I guess there's just one more thing for me to tell you, son...
You're standing in cow mess."
Adoption isn't all peaches and cream. And sometimes you have to get the stars out of your eyes to realize your knee-deep in ... you know what.
Adoption - international adoption - international adoption of a severely traumatized orphan could be the most difficult journey you will ever experience. We brought our Haitian daughter home at 4 1/2 years of age and the first three years of her life with us nearly destroyed us. She wasn't the lone survivor of a major earthquake. You could've considered her a "normal orphan" if there were such labels. But it was hard. And while we have no regrets and that difficult journey taught us so much about ourselves and about God and His unwavering love for us --we do not want to see anyone walk blindly into the adoption process. It is dangerous for the adoptive parents and for the children.
All this to say --if you have fallen in love with these precious Haitian children, praise God! Start the process and be ready for if/when the need for homes arises. But please, let's debunk the notion that the government will (or ever should) start lining these babies up at the airport and handing them out like a PetSmart adopt-a-thon.