Wednesday, November 12, 2008

Denial

While I have been busy fighting off mushy mom syndrome other family members have been living in denial of another kind. I overheard Tim and Nathan talking about something that happened on the school bus. "Was someone making fun of him?" I asked. Tim said that no one had made fun of him but that Nathan perceived that they might make fun of him and tried to avoid it. Like you, I needed a little more information to understand the situation. Here's what happened:


I walk the two oldest to the bus stop every morning and every morning when the bus comes they (and the other kids whose moms are there) give me a kiss and head off to board the big cheese. None of us have thought much about it. The families at the stop know us and know our story. No big deal.


Well, on Monday, Nathan boarded the bus to find that another student had apparently taken note of our good-byes.


Kid: You got kissed by a white girl.

Nathan: That's my mom.

Kid : Really?!

Nathan: uh, no.


"He was afraid they would make fun of him so he denied that you were his mom." Tim concluded the story. "He denied me?" I couldn't help but laugh. "Did the cock crow or what?" I asked with feigned offense.


Poor kid. What could he do? He's been outed for kissing a girl, then for kissing a white girl, then for kissing his white mom...I mean it was only getting worse and worse. I can't say that I blame him. Luckily, it wasn't one of the days that I was wearing my pajamas to the bus stop. Now, there's a day to pretend you're not related to me. You 'll be happy to know that despite this little incident, I still got a kiss before he got on the bus this morning.


sigh. We've always known that being a multi-racial family wouldn't be easy and in truth, it will be harder on our kids than on us. But we've tried to (and continue to) prepare them and will always be ready to openly and honestly talk through the tough times.


And on the opposite end of the spectrum. . . The kids were home from school a couple of days last week. Mamoune and I were watching Rachel Ray (the show I love to hate). They were doing a segment with a mother-daughter pair who looked nothing alike and giving them makeovers to try and play up the family resemblance. Mamoune looked at me with complete sincerity and said, "Oh, Mom. I wish we could go on that show and they could make us look more alike!" Through stifled laughter I said "That's a great idea, baby girl. Let's call 'em!" ;-)


Life is never dull.

2 comments:

Shaw6pak said...

Oh Mamoune, I know just how you feel. My mom is blond and blue-eyed and white, but we really are blood related. Maybe we can all four go to see Rachel Ray.

Amy - Not sure if you ever watched HBO Comic Releif...but, Whoopi would do this act as a a child with a towel on her head and say that when she grew up she wanted to have blond hair, blue eyes and be white. I knew just how she felt.

Thankfully, I am over the identity crisis. ~~~ Kristi

Kristen said...

Oh - what a story. Funny and yet so poignant. When I visited my son's classroom for the first time this year, I could just see the confusion on the other kid's faces. We don't match!